Snuffles finally passed after almost 18 years.

 Today, Snuffles finally passed.  The last thing I told her was : Go be with Nero, Pringles.  

Her life was spectacular.  Never a lap cat - always afraid of her own shadow.  Never integrated with the other cats and the last to be moved whenever we changed residence.

She was terrified of everything and the other cats did not help by constantly stalking her.  Finally when we got this home, we gave up a room for her.  That way, she would never be chased or have to hide.  It was her space.  At one rental home,, she disappeared for a week.  We went searching for her floor to floor, everywhere on the ground floor and she never responded.  I thought it was finished.  But 6 days later, she came home - practically screamed outside our door.  We were on the higher floor and somehow she found her way home.  We overturned flowerpots, neighbours stuff, spoke to everyone but no one saw her.  Yet, she came home.

I knew she was dying, because her food consumption went from one can to half a can.  She was so old, she could not eat kibbles anymore.  So it was mush food.

Yesterday, she only ate a few mouthfuls - and she was staggering about.  

I made her 'basket' up with clean linen and put her in there.  She tried to climb out but found that a bit difficult.  I knew it was the beginning of her end.

Today I had some errands to run.  When I got home just 30mins ago, I went straight to her...I called her...no response...I called her louder and her paws moved.  Less than 10mins later, she stopped breathing.

She was waiting for me to come home.

That is sad.

I was never even her 'owner'.  She wouldn't let anyone near her unless she was cornered.  Those times I had to load her into the pet carrier were nightmares.  We had to corner her into the smallest room so that we could grab her.  That was her life.  

But because she waited for me, to take her last breath, I guess I was the closest to an owner in her mind.  

I hope Pringles and Nero are with her now.  It's an end of an era.  All 18 years of hits and misses.  

I told her, I apologise for not being the best owner that I could have been for her.  I told her I hoped that was enough - shelter, food always and her own room.  

Goodbye Snuffles, or Rat as we affectionately call her - skittish until yesterday.

Go play with Nero and Pringles...be free, be unafraid because now, you can be whatever you want to be.